Wednesday, March 13, 2013

How to Survive Jury Duty.

7 am:  I wake saying "SHIT!!"  My wife says, "Boooo? You up?" ...Yeah, she calls me "Boo".

8 am: I'm at the courthouse listening to this dude tell me how to walk through a metal detector.... at least 70 other people around me holding juror papers.  Every type of American you could imagine.  I was one of them. And from the looks of things, we'd all been though metal detectors before.

9 am: We're all seated in different rooms... I walk into a room of solem faces.  "Is this the party?", I said with a big smile!  Nothing.  Crickets.

Juror #1 walks in. (That's just I'm going to call him.)
He said some shit like, "Don't worry everyone!! I'm Here!!"

... Instant Bromance.

Long story short... How and why things happen are out of our control.  Turns out Juror #1 is a very real MF.  Young but accomplished.  Full of piss and vinegar... Ready to fight on!  I loved the energy in a otherwise, bullshit setting.  He was genius.  He called me #16.  I promise you've heard of, or maybe have seen his first movie.  He read scenes from the second movie to me during lunch.  It was awesome!

Back to the Jury...

Mind you, if the case is something you care about, you go ahead and be a juror.  Your thoughts could one day change laws and lives.

Honestly, if this case were important, I would have stayed.

This is just a very, very short story of how we got out of jury duty for a "bullshit" case last Monday.  

Juror #1 "I'm Bi-Polar."

Juror #16 "You Honor,  I smoke medical marijuana!"

The look on the Judge's face was priceless.

Did You Know?   ...that when they dismiss you from Jury Duty, they give you a green piece of paper excusing from Jury Duty for a year?

Best day EVER!



Monday, March 4, 2013

The “REAL” Pimp Game - Repost

Disclaimer: I am NOT a politcal person, I'm just callin it like I see it.

The “REAL” Pimp Game.  
By @AskTheBadMan

Disclaimer Disclaimer: I may not be completely right, But I’m not completely wrong.

By popular definition:

A pimp is an agent for prostitutes who lives off their earnings. Pimping is illegal in most countries. The majority of pimps are men. A woman who runs a brothel is known as a madam. The pimp–prostitute relationship can be abusive, with the pimp using techniques such as psychological intimidation, manipulation and physical force to control the prostitutes who work for him.[1] Pimps are known under the law as procurers. In the United States, pimps are arrested and charged with pandering.

Now take away the negative shit and look up…

Dot the I’s and cross the T’s

And what do we see?

We see that a pimp is an agent who lives off earnings of others. Pimping is in most countries. The majority of pimps are men. Women Pimps are called Madams or:

Stephanie Rae Roqumore

HOUSTON — By the standards of recent financial scandals, Stephanie Rae Roqumore's alleged US$6.8 million natural gas trading scam may be small potatoes, but it raises some big questions.

Read more:



We all know that everyone who ever called Ms. Cleo got pimped!!  

The pimp–prostitute relationship can be abusive using techniques such as psychological intimidation, manipulation and physical force to control the others who work for him.[1]

Big Pimpin'

-Bernie Madoff

-Stanford Financial

-Tyco International



Pimps are known under the law as procurers. But In real life, Pimps are business people, who hustle to sell whatever the fuck they sellin’ to make money. Thereby, living off the earning they make from said hustle.

Following this theory, if one does anything to make money, one is “Pimping” something.

In the United States, pimps are arrested and charged with pandering.

  -Bernie Madoff
$65 billion missing from clients’ accounts
(although actual client losses were closer to $18 billion).

-Stanford Financial

Allen Stanford, the Texas financier accused of a $7 billion fraud,
should be transferred to another detention facility
because there has been no air conditioning in the jail cell
where he is being held, his lawyer said in a court filing.

Read more:

-Tyco International

In 2005, Kozlowski and chief financial officer Mark Swartz were convicted of stealing $600 million from the company. Kozlowski will forever be remembered for the $2 million birthday party he threw for his wife on a Mediterranean island that featured entertainers dressed in togas and an appearance by singer Jimmy Buffett—mostly at company expense.

When the WorldCom scandal hit the news in June 2002, a little known piece of legislation that had been languishing in the U.S. House and Senate was resuscitated instantaneously. Just a few weeks later, the Sarbanes-Oxley Act was approved in the House by a vote of 423-3 and in the Senate by a vote of 99-0. It introduced the most sweeping set of new business regulations since the 1930s.

Enron was the “it” company at the turn of the century. Its success seemed to define a new kind of company for the new millennium. On October 16, 2001, however, Enron announced an earnings restatement that investors immediately recognized as a harbinger of bigger problems. In six short weeks the company that had oozed wealth, smarts and power declared bankruptcy. Thousands of employees and investors saw their retirement savings vanish with the company.

I could go back forever with this shit but…

It all stops here…

The first being to buy or sell another being for money was a pimp.

Later those beings and the decendents of those beings became the top merchants, business owners, socialites and “leaders of the world”… aka: The World Bank.

All by Pimpin’.

The Real Pimps: are the ones who pimp the ones who pimp the ones who pimp the ones who pimp us. (If you really want to know who that is, go 33 “who pimp the ones” deep.)

"Bitch!! Where the fuck is my MONEY!!"

Nuff said,
Hello CIA...

The Bad Man.